Gay people don’t choose their sexuality, but they can choose to accept it.
Mark A. Peter, yesterday in Viewpoints, likened homosexuality to a confused choice made by a molested man. “Provide the evidence that I’m wrong, [that homosexuality is a choice],” he wrote.
Here is the evidence you’re wrong: I’m a (now outed) bisexual man. I’ve struggled with this identity for almost a decade. It was a battle until this summer, when I found a journal entry from when I was 14 years old saying, “I think I’m partially gay.” I suddenly realized I knew I was bisexual even before I knew what bisexuality was. Before this, I had so many doubts. “I’m falling for girls too, how could I be gay?” I’d tell myself. “Why don’t I just pretend to be straight and hope I find the right woman?”
A conversation with a friend this summer changed my perspective. I mentioned gay people are afraid of church, and I wanted it to change. Church has been such an inspirational foundation for my life; how could this group be exempt from such a gift? I was told by my friend, “How can you expect others to live openly in the church when you can’t even do it yourself?”
I realized that there is a choice, Mr. Peter. I can choose to live and be open and honest about my feelings: to stop lying, deceiving, hurting and struggling. I can talk with other people about myself, or I can choose to act how “thousands of years of cultural and historical precedent” tells me to act.
You want scientific evidence? Google it. It’s there; I’ve seen it. I’ve read it every single day hoping for an answer to who I am for years, but all along the real evidence was me.
—Bob Meyers, third-year piano performance student