Driving back from fall break with her parents' car loaded up with winter clothes, a friend of mine stashed a box of tampons behind her headrest in the back seat for safekeeping. She didn’t want the box to get crushed, needed them in an easy-to-reach location and thought the back window of the car was a perfectly suitable place. However, when her stepfather got out of the car to pump gas and caught sight of them, he became incredibly upset. He said that “no guy wants to see that,” and it was “disgusting to advertise that sort of thing.” He seemed completely panicked that this cardboard box filled with small cotton cloths was out where a poor, unsuspecting man might be subjected to viewing it. So what is it about feminine hygiene products that is so incredibly terrifying to men?
It starts with the over-sexualization of women’s bodies. Women’s bodies are so sexualized in today’s culture that preteens aren’t allowed to wear tank tops in middle school, and this is just accepted as rote — that boys cannot be held responsible for their actions or their own education if girls are distracting them by flashing some sensual upper arm. “Look what she was wearing” is a common defense for rapists, because showing cleavage is apparently an invitation to be raped. Women’s bodies are so over-sexualized that men have a hard time understanding that things like vaginas and breasts might have purposes other than their enjoyment. And when these vaginas and breasts are doing things other than providing men with pleasure, such as bleeding or birthing and feeding babies, then they’re considered disgusting — like that is something that shouldn’t be talked about, that should be handled quietly by other women, so as to not disgust the realms of men.
I’m sure anyone who has followed this year’s debates will remember Donald Trump’s comment on moderator Megyn Kelly, blaming her reaction to his behavior as a symptom of her period. It seemed to me that Trump was trying to bounce back from being managed by a woman by attacking the one thing all born-women have in common. This tells me that men, like Trump, want women to be ashamed of menstruating not just because it’s not sexy, but because it’s one of the most womanly things to do. This side of sexual shaming is a social tool used by society to keep women just a step below men. But don’t worry, there are economic tools, too.
Most states exempt certain necessity items from sales tax. These necessities include groceries, food stamp purchases, medical supplies and, in some states, even clothes. Shockingly not on the list: tampons and pads. Not only are all women paying sales tax of the products used to manage this unavoidable and biological phenomenon, but they also pay a separate luxury tax on top of it. Because having our bodies cramp up and shed out an organ lining of blood and mucus is a luxury that we are fortunate enough to experience. And pay extra for. People with diabetes who have to take insulin every day aren’t taxed on their medication, so why is it that people who bleed out of their vaginas every month have two taxes to pay? I suppose it’s because the gender wage gap isn’t quite wide enough.
It is a scientific fact that approximately 50 percent of the world’s population bleeds regularly out of their vaginas. It is an unavoidable fact of life. About 50 percent of the population has brown eyes, and that’s not something that is considered gross, shameful or disgusting. Is the reminder that women’s bodies do more than just service men too much for their fragile masculinity to handle? Is being a woman really so bad that we shouldn’t even acknowledge female health concerns? Is menstruating a luxury that women shouldn’t gloat about? There is no reason for a man to see a tampon, clean and unused in a woman’s purse, and panic. He won’t catch period cramps. He won’t spontaneously start lactating.
There’s nothing wrong with menstruating. There’s nothing wrong with being a woman. And there’s nothing disgusting or shameful about either.